Sistahs,
Over the last few years, I must say that I have discovered that being a "lady" is a dying sentiment. These letters are not meant to offend, I just want to bring to the forefront a topic that I feel is severely affecting my sistahs. So simply stated, if you are offended, read it again, because I'm probably talking about you. ;-)
I was brought up to believe that females were to act as ladies and that if a female presented herself as a lady, then she would be treated as such. I cannot even begin to count the number of times that I have heard a girl/woman say, "They don't know how to treat a lady." I must say that I do feel somewhat guilty about this, but my rhetorical response is always, "Well, most of them probably would if you even remotely acted like one." I know that sounds a little harsh, but those are my honest thoughts. With that being said, I have a couple of points to address.
1. You will be viewed as you display.
This is an important one and it is sooo based on common sense. If you don't want to be approached like a 'rat, stop dressing like a rat! Now of course there is always going to be that one token crazy fool that will approach you no matter what, but he's the exception. Seriously though, when God created women, he made some beautiful creatures. Everybody knows that. You have no need to show them every chance you get. Modesty and mystery are the tickets to being “truly” seen. If you just want to be seen, naked and nasty are the way to go. Sorry to be blunt, but I really think some of you need to hear this. You have to respect yourself before anyone else will.
This one is regarding a slightly different aspect of ladyship…
2. Stop hatin!
Personally, I have encountered more haters in my life than I deem necessary, which is why I feel this worthy of mentioning. How can you point out the lady impersonators? Look for the ones who are hatin on the real ladies! I don’t know about you, but I support my friends, family, and even strangers in their endeavors because I want them to succeed. Whether it be a business venture, marriage, or life choice, it is good to see people like us doing their thing! Why are some of you so upset at their success? If it seems as if I am singling “us” out, it is because I am.
I thought about writing these letters (they’ll be more) because I think this is stuff that just needs to be said. Just think, I am a woman/lady, if I feel this way about some of us, you just have to wonder what the men think. Hmmm...
P&B (Peace and Blessings) from one sistah to another,
Noe
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3 comments:
To your second point...
I hear what you saying. As for as my brothers, I think it should be said. Women have a lot of power and men are willing to submit to it AT TIMES. I look at the rap videos these days and I really don't care about what the homeboy is saying but what the ladies are looking like. (ie. Jay-Z's Big Pimpin, 50's Candy Store, the Infamous Nelly's Tip Drill, etc.) The beat is tight no doubt but women make the video. It's a man's world but ladies you definitely have some power. If women said, I fed up on how they are portrayed I BET all the money in the world...Rap videos will decline very fast...no money in media if noone is watching the TV set. That's what I think could happen. It has been said if men are the head women are the neck. But like your male counterpart we are turning into a generation of followers and believe that this 'look' is the way it should be based on these highly influential videos. Believe me. Don't complain if people approach a certain way because I'm sure the rappers and their entourage are very respectable of the ladies they are rapping about so why should you expect less, right?
So ladies please dress the way you need to feel comfortable. But if Joe Blow don't know...and you like like a duck, talk like a duck...well it must be a duck.
And I'm out!
PEACE!
In today's world real ladies come few and far between. I would say the primary reason for that is upbringing and just the way the world is today. Sex, Marriage, and Love are often done and said for all the wrong reasons. Mothers are younger in this day and age and quite frankly don't have the values that your grandmother or great grandmother was raised with.
Like Nate said it's a man's world, but behind every man lies an even stronger woman, if she's real. My opinion of a real woman is one that carries herself in a manner that demands respect. Not stuck up or snobbish, but respectful without having to say a word. You converse with her and you know she is a lady within 10 seconds of engaging her.
These are just my thoughts, my views drawn from my experiences of dealing with ladies and woman who are not yet grown.
Yo Boy
Bone
'Modesty and mystery are the tickets to being "truly" seen.'
Girl, you don't know how many college memories that brought to mind!
But seriously... addressing the sistahs. I'll stay tuned. We are a beautiful and dynamic group, capable of so much more than displaying body parts and hating each other. It makes me sad when I think about the stupid things we allow to get in our way. I'm convinced that at the core of the issue is a basic lack of love... for self and for others. We've had the struggle; now what about the progress?
Keep the thoughts coming.
Bestest, Court
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